32. Shawn

You know how sometimes one choice changes everything? Choosing this college, moving to that city? Buying this house, marrying that guy?  One day in March 2017 a butterfly fluttered its wings in Brazil, and a Shawn-shaped love-tornado spun my way.

The year my dad died was a tough one. Even though he was really sick and really old, it was a surprisingly big blow when he died.

I was casting about, trying to figure out what in the world mattered, when a message arrived in my inbox. It was a Meetup notification for a Byron Katie group led by someone named Shawn.

Byron Katie is a thought-leader I was interested in, so this seemed like a cool coincidence, and I decided to go.

In a quick succession I:

• Went to the Meetup

• Met Shawn Mahshie

• Signed up for her retreat

• And fell into the whirl of her love-tornado

The thing about Shawn’s retreats is that people tell the truth. Have you ever been to a place where everyone is telling the truth? Me neither, until that day. It’s hard to describe without sounding weird.

It felt alive and clean and clear and a little bit exhausting. It felt like a huge Q-tip had gone into my brain and removed all the extra. All the fake and the pretend and the worried.

The thing about Shawn is that she moves in her own orbit. She has her own time zone. She is always “right here.” And it is always “right now.”

Shawn follows whatever sparks her attention. She is intuitive and fearless and a fierce lover of life. She has a way of flowing through life. And she has this crazy ability to love people exactly as they are. And from what I can tell, when you love someone as they are, with no motive, that is when they can change.

And that is Shawn’s gift. To help people change by not trying to change them.